I need you more than want you, and I want you for all time.
~ Glenn Campbell, Wichita Lineman
The pack was on board to help, as I knew they would be. There was really no question that Seth and my parents would have my back in any situation, and if I was honest, Leah would never be selfish enough not to fight with us. I was afraid the council would have to persuade them, but Jacob said they immediately agreed to be there for us. We had Seth, Leah, Collin, Brady, the youngest Quil, and Jacob. Renée had gotten in touch with her friends, and the three of them would be heading in our direction soon. Then we had the five Denali vampire 'cousins' to add to the mix. I was still terrified, but I hesitated to admit it aloud. Instead, I kept a bright and false façade of optimism.
It was Christmas Eve, and Edward and Alice had disappeared outside to set up for the party they insisted should still go on. I felt that our time would be better utilized through fight training, but, according to Alice, we had a solid month before death came to call. It wasn't enough time; I needed the whole of eternity to show Edward how I felt. I had taken our immortality for granted, I could see that. Now that it was no longer guaranteed, I couldn't tamp down the panic for long. I found my breathing getting out of control as I tried to do my makeup for the party in Edward's old bedroom.
"Bella," I heard. It was a soft sound, almost a plea, from the doorway.
I lowered my head between my knees as the world around me spun. "Edward," I gasped.
His hand rested between my shoulder blades, and I breathed deeply. He calmed me, centered me, when things went wrong. "We are almost ready downstairs. I thought I would get dressed, and instead I hear you up here hyperventilating."
"I can't wrap my head around the fact that we could die in a month. Our time is no longer promised to us. I can't bear the thought of any of us no longer existing, Edward."
"I will always be with you. I will not live in a world without you, so if we do not win the fight, I will go with you into the afterlife, whatever it may be."
Edward's words caused a choked sob to escape my throat. "I don't want to think about a world where you don't exist. My greatest fear is losing you."
"We have some time, and we need to enjoy it to the fullest, especially with the added knowledge that perhaps we are not promised forever. I love you, and I wish to spend a pleasant evening with you by my side."
And it only took that soft declaration for me to realize that he was right. I'd tried so hard to convince the others that we shouldn't be ruled by fear, but that didn't mean I wouldn't freak out a hundred times a day between now and next month. For now, I was content to have an intimate party with my true family. It had grown, it was large and unorthodox, but the one thing we all had in common was love.
"You're right. Let's get dressed, then." I gave him a weak smile and he moved to the bathroom to get ready.
Alice had given me a long white dress with a faux fur cape of sorts. The dress was ankle length with long sleeves, and the shoes she gave me were white boots with a flat heel. It was a snow themed party, according to Alice, but I was pretty sure I'd seen colors of all kinds on the others before I came upstairs. Nonetheless, I pulled everything out and waited for Edward to finish changing before I got undressed.
When he emerged from the bathroom looking devastatingly handsome in a black suit, I walked up to him and wrapped my arms around him. I stood on my tiptoes, he leaned down, and our lips met. His scent overwhelmed my senses, permeated my brain like a dose of oxytocin. I kissed him thoroughly, languidly, letting the zapping sensations surge through my body to my extremities. I would cling to him this evening, giving him the party and pleasantness he craved. I would be strong and hold my emotions at bay and my head high.
"I will see you downstairs," he mumbled against my lips.
"Yes. Just give me a few moments."
I changed quickly, eager to rejoin my anchor. I wasn't used to feeling so emotionally all over the place. I tried to be strong and smart and not get carried away, but I also realized that this threat was very real and not to be taken lightly.
I slipped out the bedroom door before my thoughts took an ominous turn again. Slowly descending the stairs, I admired the candles that Alice and the others had strewn throughout the house. The overhead lights were dimmed, and I could see and smell a fire roaring in the living room fireplace.
I also found my fiancé waiting for me there, a smile on his face. "You are illecebrous. Shall we?" he asked, offering me his arm. I made a mental note to ask him later what he meant, but I took it as a compliment.
Together we walked outside, and I suddenly had the sense that there was more to this party than I'd assumed. I spotted Emily and Seth. I found my parents, both Sue and Harry, and Charlie and Renée. Jacob was standing with his arm around Leah, a huge grin on his face. The Cullens were interspersed with the others, and I noticed the newcomers that could only be vampires, given their perfect pale skin and golden eyes. I deduced they were the cousins from Alaska that must have arrived while I was upstairs. They were stupidly attractive; like the gene pool collected around them and blessed them excessively. And lastly, I spotted Jessica and Angela bouncing up and down in their excitement.
The people tipped me off, but what confirmed my suspicion was the makeshift aisle that had been set up in the backyard, and the fact that these people were seated on either side of it, and only stood when Edward and I stepped outside.
I turned to him, accusations on the tip of my tongue. I bit them back, touched beyond belief at the look of pride on his face. Yes, I hated surprises, but this was a good one. "You did this for me?"
"I did. It is meant to be a Christmas gift, of sorts. A simple ceremony with our friends and family." He was beaming, his angel's face glorious. "I want to pledge my love and devotion to the best thing that has ever happened to me."
"Wow," I breathed. No pressure.
We made our way down the aisle, where Carlisle stood waiting for us. Edward held my hand as we turned to face Carlisle, who had a gentle smile for us.
"I want you to know before we start, Bella, that I am honored to be the one to perform the ceremony. It makes me incredibly happy to know that the man I chose to be my first son has now chosen such a wonderful woman with whom to spend his life."
I had to swipe at a tear, and then I closed the distance between us and kissed Carlisle's cold cheek. "Thank you, Carlisle, for making me feel entirely welcome into your family."
He looked to the sea of faces that had blurred before my eyes, and thanked them for coming, and for keeping the secret. "I know that Edward has romantic tendencies, so I appreciate each and every one of you that came to celebrate the love of Edward Anthony Masen Cullen and Isabella Marie Swan Clearwater."
I looked to Edward at hearing this new iteration of my name. "A gift for your birth parents. It will be up to you if you wish to make it permanent."
Adding Cullen on top of the mouthful it had become would not be ideal. I shook my head slightly and tuned in to Carlisle.
"Today, there will be no dearly beloved, no betrothed, and no ancient rhyme of the married. Today, there are no dead languages to solemnize vows that are very much alive and will remain so for a lifetime. Today, promises become permanent, and friends become family. This day is not about the words spoken or the rings exchanged, nor is it about grand pronouncements and recessional marches.
"This day—the day of Bella and Edward's wedding—is about love.
"One of my favorite quotes is, 'If love is not all, then it is nothing: this principle, and its opposite, collide down all the years of my breathless tale.' Bella and Edward, your breathless tale is just beginning. If love is not all, then it is nothing. Its opposite—if love is all, then it is everything—is going to be the basis for every aspect of your relationship.
"All you have to do is simply love one another, and that love shows through in everything you do for one another; how you treat each other, in good times and bad.
"Love isn't just a word; it's an action.
"Love isn't just something you say, it's something you do.
"Despite all of our differences, love is what we all share.
"It is the great unifier—our one universal truth.
"No matter who we are, where we've come from, what we believe, we know this one thing: love is what we're doing right. There are many different kinds of love, almost, if not all of which, are represented here today. There is romantic love, the love of parents and children, of brothers and sisters and family, and love amongst friends.
"Love is genuine, honest, and open, compassionate and kind, passionate and blind, love doesn't know space or time, nor look through jealous eyes, and in the modified words of Paul in his letter to the Corinthians, 'Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things.'
"Most importantly, love never dies.
"Not only do Bella and Edward love one another romantically—and they do, you can see it in every look, every touch, every moment they're together—they also love one another as friends. In fact, I would suggest they're best friends, constantly taunting and teasing and very plainly and obviously having fun together. This new journey will be at times richly rewarding and extremely difficult, but, most importantly, it will be a journey you take together.
"Marriage is much more than your signatures on a legal contract. You must promise to embrace conflict as well as peace; to work as well as play; to struggle as well as coast; to give as well as receive; and to be with, stay with, and move toward one another.
"This wedding is a symbol of that commitment."
I blinked back my tears as Edward took my hands in his. He slipped a plain band on my finger to share the space with my engagement ring.
"Just as this circle is without end, my love for you is eternal. Just as it is unbreakable, my commitment to you will never fail. With this ring I take you to be my trusted partner for eternity. You are the only one who has ever touched my heart. It will always be yours."
He kissed the back of my hand once the ring was in place, and suddenly I had to think of something to say as a heavy band was placed in my hand to give to Edward.
"This ring is a symbol that I choose you to be my lover, my partner, and my best friend. Today, tomorrow, and always."
My emotions completely overwhelmed me, and I couldn't say another word. I stared into Edward's golden eyes as Carlisle finished out the ceremony.
"You are now bound together, your two lives joined by love and trust into one life."
Edward leaned down to kiss me, and everything else fell away. My fears, my nerves, the butterflies in my belly. I felt whole, at peace, and perfectly content to continue kissing him until someone cleared their throat. Laughing, I pulled back and grinned at Edward before turning to face the group of friends and family gathered in the yard.
As we celebrated, Charlie hovered near me. He asked for a dance, and he told me he was happy that I'd found something as strong as what he shared with my mother.
"I didn't think it was possible for others to understand, but I realize I was blinded. I see it in the faces of your adoptive parents, and I see it in the faces of the Cullens. I guess I thought I'd found a one of a kind love, and that I had to protect it at all costs. Now I see that while it's one of a kind for me, it's universal to love someone with your entire being."
"I really appreciate that, Charlie. I don't begrudge your love for Renée, just the opposite. It makes me happy to know that the vision I always had of the two of you so much in love was accurate. You weren't alone all those years, and that's comforting. And yes, I have found something as strong, within the bonds of mating and imprinting."
"I… I love you, Bella. I believe that you knew already, but those words don't come easily. I may not say it all the time, but please know that it's true."
I smiled gently at him, feeling my heart swell so much that I worried it would burst. "I love you, too. Dad."
He coughed for a second before smiling back at me. "I hope you're right about next month. It has me so worried for you and Renée."
"I know, Charlie. Me, too."
Yes, as I looked out at the twinkling lights in the Cullen's backyard, the way they reflected and sparkled off the nearby water, my gut constricted with the nagging worry of what was to come after the party was over.
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