MeteorOnAMoonlessNight: Without Wings Chapter Two

Waking from a rough sleep, Bella lifted her head from the pillow and tried to make herself get out of bed. Dreams—nightmares—had plagued her throughout the night. Edward still slept on, his graying copper hair buried in his pillowcase, but she heard the telltale sound of small feet pounding down the hallway. Hurrying to dress, Bella made her way downstairs in time to nab Aerinn before she could plow into Tyler coming out of the kitchen.

"Slow down, little bit." Bella pushed Aerinn’s long dark hair off her face and straightened her shirt. She’d almost certainly grow up to be Layla’s twin.

Tyler set a platter of scrambled eggs on the table. "You almost wore the eggs."

"Ew."

Laughing, Bella scooped up her granddaughter and sat in a chair with her. "I'm starving, are you?"

"Starving," Aerinn agreed.

"Where's Mommy?"

"Peeing."

"Oh." That made her laugh again, and she hugged Aerinn tighter.

Tyler brought in another platter, that one piled high with bacon, and Aerinn helped herself. She chattered, kicking her feet, but Bella couldn't focus on a thing she said.

They had seen the empty nest coming, of course, but hadn't expected to hate it so much. When she should have taken the time to enjoy her husband on every surface of the newly empty house, they instead worked long hours and tried to fill the void with their grandchild. It was surreal to not have anyone but Tyler working in the house, and he usually kept a split shift in order to prepare breakfast and dinner. No kids, no associates, no basement full of Irish Cullens made for an unbearable silence. And they tried not to mention the elephant in the room at all costs, to pretend it wasn't a problem and they had nothing to worry about.

Layla and Edward came in at nearly the same time, Edward heading for the coffee carafe Tyler was filling, and Layla for the chair beside Bella. Aerinn immediately squirmed down and chose a spot of her own.

"I have a missed call from James Holden," Edward commented, scrolling through his phone. “Must have been while I was in the shower.”

“What could he—” The serving spoon in Bella’s hand clattered to the plate. “No.” Sitting back heavily, she stared up at Edward with her hand over her mouth.

"Tyler," Edward said calmly. "Please take Aerinn to the kitchen."

"Sure thing, boss. Come on, little bit, you can help me squeeze the orange juice."

Pale and frozen, Layla stood behind her chair, white knuckling the back of it and saying nothing. Bella couldn't help noticing that she trembled.

"First, let me call him back. Then we can decide if we should get upset." Edward had somehow always been able to remain calm in emergencies, a talent Bella envied greatly.

"He's retired," Layla agreed in a monotone. "It can't mean anything."

"Sit before your legs give out," Edward ordered. Bringing the phone to his ear, he spoke into it. "Holden, it’s Cullen."

Bella bit her lip, trying to hear what James had to say. Layla obeyed Edward’s command, sinking into the dining room chair. Bella reached over and gripped her icy hand.

"That's the dumbest fucking thing I've heard in my life," he barked.

A quaking began low in Bella’s spine, working its way up until her teeth rattled. Quinn, was all she could think. My baby boy.

"Are you fucking kidding me‽" Edward shouted. "If they won't fix this, then you damn well better!"

Breathe, Bella. That's all you have to do. Just breathe.

"How long has he been on this mission?" Pacing across the room, Edward tore at his hair with his free hand. "The fuck you can't! I'm his father!" Nearly throwing the phone down, he mashed the screen with his thumb. "Say it again, Holden. Tell Quinn’s wife and mother why he won't be coming home."

Whatever strength she'd clung to had left her, and Bella dropped her head to the table with a sob.

"Where are you standing right this second?" Holden asked over the speakerphone.

"The dining room," Edward replied tersely.

"Right now, on this connection, in the place you're standing, I can't divulge any information."

"You’re telling me the best you've got to say is that no man left behind is a bunch of fucking bullshit?"

"Yeah, that's not the motto of the CIA, Cullen."

With a roar, Edward shoved at the nearest console table until the vase on top fell over. No one even flinched at the crash of breaking glass. "What is the fucking point of your phone call? You know precisely what I'm going to do next, and you know there's not a goddamn thing you can do to stop me."

"Well, that's actually why I called." Holden's voice was wry. "You know I'm not active anymore, so when a call comes to me . . ."

"Spit it out," Layla demanded.

Bella lifted her head in shock. Then again, she’d always known Layla had an amazing underlying strength.

"As I've said, it's not something we can talk about right now."

"Then I suggest you come here. Now," Edward snarled.

"That was my plan, but then you started shouting at me."

Bella let out a strangled scream. "Shut the fuck up, hang up the phone, and get your ass over here!"

The doorbell rang, echoing over the phone.

As Edward jogged to the door, Bella infused as much venom in her voice as possible. "You are the biggest asshole I've ever met."

"That’s not a very nice way to greet an old friend, Bella."

"I hate you." Layla rose from the table, crossing her arms as James walked in.

Making his way to the coffee carafe, he ignored her and asked, "No goons, no guns, no guards? Doesn't even feel like I’m really in the Cullen mansion."

Edward looked incredibly close to bashing in Holden's head. "What the fuck—"

"Down. Stairs."

Sighing heavily, Bella was the first to go. Recently, they'd made changes to the secret underground bunker, adding a normal door from the hallway and moving out most of the furniture. Tyler would keep Aerinn occupied as long as necessary, she knew that for certain. Only once the four of them were down there with the door closed and the signal scramblers turned on did James begin to speak.

“I won't sugarcoat it, Cullen. The mission went to hell.”

Bella snorted. “Obviously!”

Layla paced, scrubbing her hands through her hair before yanking out her ponytail holder. “What are you doing about it?”

“On the record, nothing.” They all opened their mouths, but he held up his hand before anyone could protest. “But I’ve asked if I can bring in a team of mercs to locate the operatives and bring them home.”

Though it was barely eight in the morning, Edward poured a short glass of whiskey. “You know I’ll do it with or without you, Holden.”

“Yes, I do.” Facing Bella, he said, “I know what you all gave up the last time. I understand what it cost you.”

“This is different.”

“By a long shot.”

Layla stood beside her mother-in-law and grasped her hand. “They’ll go.”

“Yes,” Holden said. “The plan is to call the rag tag lot of you my mercenary team, despite that being utter bullshit.”

“We might as well be,” Edward said, downing the drink.

“But it’s been a long time since we’ve done anything close to what you’re talking about,” Bella mentioned. “What are we talking about, by the way?”

“Afghanistan.”

“Son of a whore.” Pinching the bridge of his nose, Edward said, “Bella’s right. We haven't trained in years. I’ve used the range a time or two, and I still work out, but the others haven't really kept it up.”

“There’s been no reason to.” Layla sucked in air, her chest heaving. “We thought we had peace, but now you’re bringing us another war.”

“I can't say it’s entirely unexpected, Layla. Your husband knew what he was doing when he signed on.”

Her laugh was ugly. “I didn't like it from the beginning, you know that. Never knowing where he is, if he’s alive or dead, or fucking starving to death in a cell in the desert!”

Bella felt her throat closing up. Layla rarely used foul language, but she perfectly articulated what all three Cullens were thinking.

“We’ve wandered around like ghosts, acting as though he’s already dead because he’s been on radio silence for three goddamn years, and now you tell me you fucked up the mission and won’t bother bringing him home to me? To his daughter?” Tears fell from her eyes in a torrent. “You’re the one who made it seem like it’s a fantastic profession, you know. Telling him he had talent and that he could emulate his father while walking a fine line between the legal and illegal. Well, fuck you to hell and back, James Holden!”

“Layla.” Despite her backing away from him, James moved forward and grabbed her shoulders. “Quinn is excellent at his job.” She fought him off, and he released her. “I don't have all the details, but he’s the only reason his team is still alive in the first place. I promised you I’d bring him home, and that’s what we’ll do.”

“Whatever it takes, Layla,” Bella assured her.

“I haven't had time to come up with a plan yet, so let me get that straightened out and we’ll meet again this evening.”

When James left, Layla went upstairs to be with her daughter. Edward sank heavily onto the couch in the basement, the whiskey decanter in one hand and his glass in the other.

“We can't do this.”

“There’s never been a time when we couldn't do the hard things,” Bella said. But her stomach rolled, and she clasped her hands over it in defense.

“All these years, Bella.” Swallowing the last drop of his drink, he poured more. “All these sins. My sins, and he’s paying for them. When will it be enough?”

“Quinn chose this.”

“It’s nearly as bad as taking over the Cullen Family.”

“Just more legal.”

“I never realized how hard it would be.” His wedding band clanked against the glass as he drank. “Not hearing from him. Never knowing what part of the world he’s in, or how much danger he’s facing.”

“But we agreed it was his choice, and we would accept it.”

“I’m such a hypocrite.”

Bella watched him finish off his second glass and refill it again. “How’s that?”

“I can't accept it. I tried, Bella. I tried so hard to be okay with his career, but, God forgive me, I can't!” Rising quickly, he dropped the empty glass and decanter on the side table and stalked to the far side of the room. “I’m a fucking criminal, and I can’t abide my son being CIA.”

“He’s been more honest and responsible than anyone we know practically from the day he was born, Edward. We knew for a long time he wouldn’t take your job.”

“Not the illegal one, at least. But why couldn't he be happy with the coffee roastery? He helped me run it for so long that I dropped my guard.”

“And then the shit with the Russians came along, and he realized he was built for something greater. Like it or not, he is your son.”

“I don't like it.” Spinning, he crossed the room to frame her face in his hands. “I wanted him safe.”

“I know.” Resting her hands over his, she repeated, “I know.”

Backing up, he shook his head. “And now, when he needs me the most, I’m not strong enough to save him.”

“We’ll figure it out, Edward. There are plenty of us to go there and help.”

“A bunch of soft, middle-aged men? Great.” More amber liquid splashed against the cut crystal. “What happens when we fail? Am I supposed to be strong enough to come back here and look Layla in the eyes when I tell her I couldn't do it? Who will tell Aerinn the father she barely knows is actually gone for real?”

“Don't.” Fuck, her heart couldn't take it. “Please, don't talk that way. I can't stay above water if you give up. I need you to keep me afloat, and I’ll do the same for you.”

Emerald green eyes full of anguish met hers. “But I’m already drowning, baby.”