Fire In The Water Chapter Twenty-three

Ward

I had to be strong for Bella. For myself. She was right about that. Running was easier, and it had become the simple choice. It used to be, I never backed down from a fight. Prison had changed that about me, when I learned that fighting made things worse. Over time, they had beaten the urge to defend myself right out of me. Bella was worth more than that to me. I needed her like I needed air to breathe, and I would do whatever it took to keep her in my life. 

I came back down the stairs from retrieving Heidi and stopped in front of a bulletin board mounted on the wall by the bathrooms. There were job postings, yard sales, and local events pinned to the board. One sea-foam green paper caught my eye: Train To Be A Vet Tech While Working In The Kennels. 

Ripping the paper from the cork, I carried it with me next door. Alice and Ro stood near the refreshment table, fooling no one with their carefully blank expressions. Clearly, I was the topic of conversation since they fell silent when they saw me. 

"Oh, you brought your girl!" Ro exclaimed, moving closer and dropping to the floor in a fluid motion. "Heidi, right?"

Confirming Ro was correct, Heidi thumped her tail at the sound of her name. The two of them spent a few minutes focused on each other, so I took the opportunity to watch Bella. Her eyes were red and her cheeks flushed. Some of her hair had escaped the bandana she liked to wear, and the wispy bits flattered her face. 

"Look what I found." Holding out the paper, I said, "I bet I could bring Heidi with me."

Bella's smile brightened her face. "That position would suit you."

"The hours are probably early, but certainly better than what I'm used to." Tentatively, I reached out to curl errant strands behind her ear. "So I can be a permanent citizen of Port Townsend."

Alice had sidled over to Ro and Heidi, but she glanced over at my words. I wondered what exactly they'd said about me while I was next door. 

"Can we take Heidi to the park?" Alice asked. 

"Oh, yeah, of course. She'd love that."

When Bella and I were alone, she took my hand and led me deeper into the store. The place was empty, maybe because everyone was enjoying the water on a sunny day. I felt nervous, positive she was about to break up with me.

"Bella, I—"

But she interrupted me with a hand in the air. "Deep down, Ward, what do you want?"

"You. Without a doubt." As if she had to ask. 

"Yet, despite wanting me, you would take off in a heartbeat if shit got tough.”

Sighing, I wondered how my life had been reduced to this. “Not from any tiny argument or issue, Bella. To save your precious life.” I wish she could understand the difference. Running was a last-ditch option, and I’d only do it if I thought someone was using her to get to me. 

“I want to talk to either Victoria or Eric. If they can determine who this guy is, that’s one less thing to worry about.”

She had a point. We’d spent so much time, so much effort, building this relationship from what was left of my decaying soul. My instincts were to protect her at all costs, even if it ruined me. If I had to put her in danger to keep us together, could I do that? Did I build this ship from the ground up, only to wreck it?

“Baby, I want to fight for you.” The words were nothing less than the truth, but they scared the ever-living fuck out of me. “No matter how difficult it becomes.”

“I want that, too.” Tears had built in her eyes again, and I refrained from wiping them away. “But only if I know you’ll stick with me. It’s too hard to be on the edge all the time, thinking you’ll leave me at the slightest hint of danger.”

“Saving yourself over me makes sense. It’s like when they tell you to put on your oxygen mask first before helping others.” And this baby was going down in flames if I couldn't pull up at the last second. If we crashed, there wouldn't be any coming back from the wreckage.

With a light kiss, Bella said, “Only because I can’t help you if I pass out from lack of oxygen. Not because I love you any less.”

My head throbbed. “One thing is for certain; we need to find out who this is.”

“Yes, I agree. The worry is too much for either of us, and it could turn out to be nothing.”

The likelihood of it being nothing was pretty much slim to none. Not with the life I'd led. As usual, my past had come back to fuck me over. “Can we call them, or do you want to walk down there after the store closes?”

“Well, I called Mama to keep an eye on the place while we went down to the station. If that’s okay with you.”

I guess whatever she wanted was okay with me. “Will she watch Heidi, or do I need to put her back upstairs?”

Bella laughed, and the sound made me happy. A fraction of stress lifted off my shoulders to hear her happiness. “Oh, Lord, Mama Riley loves your Heidi. Of course she’d love to watch her for a bit.”

Since we were expecting her mother, I thought we should head up front and just wait. However, the second I tried to walk off, Bella grabbed my arm.

“What?”

She answered me without words. Pulling my head down, she met my lips with hers, tasting of coffee and cinnamon. Her tongue tangled with mine, and I moaned into her mouth. Tangling her fingers in the hair at my nape, she tugged until she angled my head to better suit her needs. When Bella took charge, it made my lust ratchet up much faster. Crushing her to me, I devoured her mouth with eager motions. Biting her lip, dragging my teeth across it, I listened to her ragged breathing as she gripped my head for dear life. When she made a soft mewling sound, I feared I would push her against the nearest shelf to have my way with her. Instead, she shifted my t-shirt until she could touch the bare skin of my back, making goosebumps rise on my arms.

“Oh, look, dear,” I heard Jason say. “The children have made up.”

I froze.

“And now they’re making out.”

Jumping away from Bella, I felt my face redden with heat. Riley basically guffawed, clearly pleased at ruffling my feathers. Bella grinned, unfazed at getting caught in flagrante.

“Ms. Mathis. Mr. Jenks. I—we—” I stuttered.

“Don't go gettin’ all stuffy on us, son.” Riley plopped her large quilted bag on the checkout counter and looked around the store. “Where in the world is my sweet Heidi?”

“Ro and Alice took her down to the park,” Bella replied, taking my hand and dragging me up front.

“All to give you two privacy to start neckin’, I presume.”

That was it: I was actually going to die of embarrassment, right there in Bella’s beloved store.

“Anyway,” Bella said. “We’re heading down to the station.”

Riley rested her hand lightly on my upper back. “Good luck.”

“Thanks.” I was proud of myself for not flinching, though the urge had been there. Riley would never hurt me, obviously, but my natural reflex was to avoid all forms of touch.

Bella was the one exception to the rule. I wondered if she knew it.

The sun beat down on us as we left the store, and I noticed she’d changed her chalkboard sign. It was too bad, really, since I thought the first one was amusing. Nerves built in my gut and sweat popped out on my forehead the closer we got to the police station. For myriad reasons, I despised being inside one.

Both the exterior and the interior looked about how I expected, with a small reception area and pale blue walls. Nothing stood out to me as being remarkable, but my stomach twisted into knots as Bella asked for Officer White.

“Hey, there,” Victoria greeted us. She held her hand out to Bella, but at a subtle head shake from my girlfriend, Victoria didn’t reach out to me. “What can I do for you?”

“Someone has been lurking around Bookish and Corner Café. I’d hoped you could help us identify him and see what he wants.”

“Let’s go back to my office.”

‘Her office’ was actually a cubicle in the middle of a tiny square room, surrounded by three other desks and a conference table. Phones rang, voices rose, the scent of bitter coffee filled the room—

And a panic attack threatened to send me to my knees.

“Ward?” Bella murmured. “Take a deep breath.”

Breathing in through my nose, I recalled the sweet scent of Bella’s hair. The way her skin felt like satin under my fingers. The sound of her losing her mind when I made her come.

“What is that expression about?”

I heard the smile in her voice, and when I opened my eyes, I kissed the top of her head. “Thinking of you to calm myself down.”

“Did it work?”

Nodding, I saw that Victoria had stopped and was silently waiting for us. When Bella nodded too, she led us to the conference table, and we all sat.

“This is probably as private as we’ll get, unless I commandeer Eric’s actual office with an actual door.”

“This should be fine,” Bella responded.

Pulling her notepad from her breast pocket, Victoria wrote something at the top. “What details can you give me about this guy?”

Bella told her of the man coming into Bookish, and the strange vibe he gave her. Stating it wasn’t enough to report, Bella told her that nonetheless, the guy made her very uncomfortable. “And then Jasper told us last night that the man was in Corner Café, asking for Ward.”

“Asking for him by name?” Victoria clarified.

“That’s what he said.”

Nodding at Bella, Victoria said, “I’ll talk to Jasper when we’re done here. Do either of you have a photo of this guy?”

Pursing her lips, Bella shook her head. “I've never had a reason for surveillance cameras. I don’t think Jasper has any, either, but you can ask him.”

“Describe him for me.”

After pausing, Bella said, “There wasn’t anything about him that stood out. He had on a black ball cap, and he’d pulled it so low over his face I couldn't make out his features. Um, Caucasian. Tall-ish.”

“Okay. Taller than Ward? Shorter?”

Flushing at Victoria’s piercing gaze, I swallowed and waited for Bella to answer.

“About as tall.” She closed her eyes. “No, that’s not right.”

We waited while she tapped her fingers on the table.

“Ward is tall enough for the top of the shelves to come to here.” She demonstrated, holding her hand sideways at breast height. “But the other guy, it was more like here.” Her hand rose a few inches.

“Are you 6’2” or 6’3”, Ward?” Victoria asked.

“Uh, 2.” My mouth was dry, but at least I no longer felt trapped.

“Thought so,” she muttered, scribbling away. “So the lurker is more like 5’11’, 6 feet. Build?”

Bella tilted her head. “Pudgy, I guess? Not obese, but not slender. A bit of a paunch. Mostly, I didn’t look closely at him, but I did give him a cup of coffee.”

“And you didn't see his hair color, eye color? Birthmarks, scars, tattoos?”

Again, Bella closed her eyes. Her hand came up to her neck, her fingers trailing behind her ear. “Something here.”

“Was it dark like a mole?”

“Dark, like a tattoo.” Sighing, Bella opened her eyes. “But I can’t bring up an image in my head of what it was. Maybe a star or something.”

“Okay, I’ll just put down small tattoo or birthmark.”

“What should we do next?” Bella asked.

“Well.” Victoria put down her pen and folded her hands. “I’ll speak with Jasper, see if he can fill in any gaps on the guy’s description. Maybe it was a coincidence, and it’s not the same person in both instances.”

“He asked for Ward.” Bella cleared her throat. “It wasn’t a local, or I would have recognized him. So would Jasper.”

“Is there anyone you can think of who’d ask after you without leaving their name?” Victoria asked me.

How to answer without being a smartass? “There could be, from back home in Maryland.”

Bella’s eyes widened. It was the only time I’d ever told anyone where I’m from besides her.

“But they would just find my apartment, I’d think. It’s odd they’re looking in places where I’ve been seen with Bella, but not at my home.”

If they did find me at my home, I feared what would happen—to them. I was capable of terrible things.

Just ask the ADA in Maryland.

Victoria nodded. “So, for the time being, I would say remain alert. If you see this person, don’t engage with them. Call me directly if you want, or the main line. Please don’t dial 911 unless the man threatens you or takes action against you.”

Remaining alert was the number one strategy in my life. Calling 911 would only be for the other guy’s benefit.

“If you wish to install security cameras, that’s certainly an option. I’ll make sure we patrol the area more often until we identify the subject.”

“Thanks, Vicky.” Bella stood, looking at me.

I rose, quietly thanking Victoria.

Once outside, I didn’t know what to say. Bella took my hand, and we walked down to the water’s edge. People were everywhere, and I tugged on my own ball cap to hide my hair. It was second nature by then, even if it wasn’t necessary anymore. Then again, perhaps it was still entirely necessary.

“They’ll figure out who it is.”

Her words were soft, and I knew she meant to reassure me. But she had no way of knowing what would happen next.

“I’m sure you’re right.” It was the white kind of lie; the harmless kind meant to bring comfort. 

Then why did it feel like such a betrayal to say it?

Ro

Vicky