FAÇADE Chapter 4

I didn't know you'd be insane, but it's true

All I am to you is a

stain on your blade, blood on your knife

Love ain't no fairytale, love is a buried nail

If she's in the house of pain, then love is standin' outside

But maybe I'm the twisted one that screwed this up

~Skylar Grey & Eminem, Twisted

When I realized I didn't really know Bella at all.

Settling in to this new life wasn't hard. I knew the ropes, and was able to provide an Oscar worthy performance. Jasper wasn't showing me anything I hadn't done through other undercover jobs. I was supposed to know the drill anyhow, so it was no big deal that I caught on quickly. The accounts he gave me were easy, the type of men that paid on time with no complaints. I was raking in money, and I knew that I had to be somewhat judicious with it seeing as how I was a fed and it was dirty money, but I was getting a two bedroom apartment and fuck the consequences.

I met with Black on the trail weekly, giving Bella the excuse I was out for a jog. Technically, it was true, because I did jog to meet him. Bella didn't care anyway, because she kept disappearing on days she wasn't working, and I wondered if she had a boyfriend she didn't want me to know about. Black said an apartment was fine, but anything expensive had to be approved, so I was stuck with the rusty bucket of bolts I was still driving. I thought for a long time about giving Bella money for a car of her own, just something cheap, because she was always taking a cab or the bus, and I didn't like the thought of her being unsafe. I struggled with the idea that I might be falling in love with her, because it seemed like only an idiot would find themselves in that situation. Her well-being was important to me in a way that proved I was in over my head, while she hardly noticed me.

I wanted to bring up the idea of a car to her, so I went home midday to ask her what she thought. She was usually home until late afternoon or early evening, ‘cause she was too broke to really do anything before work.

When I walked in the front door there was a large, dark haired man sitting on my couch, a.k.a. my bed, that I recognized. It was a guy in the operation known as the Garrotter. His real name was Garrett Russo, and he was infamous at the division for being one of the bloodiest enforcers in the Cullen family mob. As his nickname suggested, his favorite means to an end was a piece of thin steel wire with a handle on each end. He was known to be ruthless and cold-blooded, and here he was chatting with my roommate.

Bella was sitting there across from him on the coffee table, leaning towards him like they were deep in conversation or they were about to make out, I wasn't sure which. She was a deep, dark brunette these days, with winged eyeliner and a full sixties vibe. Her minidress showed off her long fucking legs, her boots thigh high and sexy as fuck. They looked new, and I wondered where she'd gotten the money. Irrationally, I wondered if the Garrotter was her pimp now.

“Home early, aren't we?” she asked casually as she looked up at me.

“I didn't realize the queen was coming for a visit, sorry,” I said snarkily. “I left my tiara in the car.” I dipped into a fake curtsey.

“Why are you here, Tony?” she asked, though not unkindly.

“I wanted to have a word with you, about somethin’ that’s been buggin’ me, but apparently you're busy.”

“You can come by the club tonight. I'm sure they'd still let you in the door.” She smirked.

“As long as Felix hasn't found reason to be pissed at me, yeah.”

Garrotter said nothing, but he watched the both of us as we spoke like it was some kind of sick tennis match. When Bella stared at me, I realized they were waiting for me to leave so they could resume what they were doing.

“All right, I'll see you later, then.” I backed out, disgusted at feeling like I had to leave my own apartment because of whatever she had going on.

I was worked up, pissed off, and a little terse with my customers the rest of the day. Not that they were going to complain or anything, seeing as how they had to pay me or face worse consequences, like the fucking Garroter. They probably wouldn't start with him though. I’d heard of a Jimmy Two Face, dude that had a wrecked face after an accident with acid. He was usually sent in for the kneecap busting with a ball bat if someone was late with their cheddar.

That night at the club, Felix did indeed let me in without pause, though it wasn't like he smiled at me or any such pleasantries. The girls on stage were the usual pale, scrawny girls that I was used to. God only knew how desperate the fuckers in this town had to be to come to see this chicken flesh on stage. Musta been hard up at home. I found Bella dressed for the stage, sitting in the employee lounge with knee high socks and a fucking school girl outfit. Her hair was in pigtails, and that was all it took for my soldier to stand at attention. I was such a goner.

“Bella,” I greeted her tightly.

“Tony,” she acknowledged as I sat across from her at the tiny and very sticky table.

“I wanted to ask your opinion on picking up a small and cheap car for you. I don't like you spending so much time on the city bus, and I know you don't really have the chips to pay for a taxi.”

“You're serious?” she said, doubt in her voice.

“Yeah, or I wouldna said it.” She made me feel shifty when she looked at me that closely.

“You really are a good guy, aren't you, Tony?” Her brow was raised, and I tried hard not to squirm.

“I guess. All the girls want a bad boy though, so it sucks for me in the long run.” That was absolutely a dig at her meeting earlier with Garrett.

“Um, something super cheap though, right? I don't want you spending a lot of money on me. It makes me uncomfortable.”

“Yeah, just a beater to get you to work and back. I mean, I know you do other stuff, too, so it has to run and all.” I suddenly couldn't bring myself to make eye contact.

“Maybe we can take some time this weekend and look,” she agreed.

So that's what we ended up doing. We perused the papers on Saturday and Sunday, and called a few people. I looked online at classified type sites. We had a really good time looking around, driving all over the city and test driving cars. Most were serious pieces of shit, and we still hadn't found anything by lunch time Sunday. We sat at an outdoor burger place as the Spring air tried it's best to climb out of the high fifties. We had grease running down our chins as we laughed and talked about the bigger place we were going to look for next weekend. We would finally have the space we needed, with a bedroom for me and a living room that wasn't doubling as a bedroom. It was the relationship we’d shared at the beginning, and I realized with a sharp pang that it had moved into vague acquaintance territory recently.

Finally we found something, and it was just perfect. It was a tiny hatchback that had seen better days and had so many miles on it I would swear the odometer should just be rolling over to one any day now. Doe-eyes was all smiles as she got in it to drive home after some paperwork and some cash had been exchanged. We agreed to go first thing the next morning to file the paperwork to make it official.

It had been a really good weekend, so when Monday rolled around bleak and stormy, and I was cranky from a lack of sleep, I tried not to take it out on her. I tried, I really tried, but I hadn't slept soundly since accepting this job three months ago.

“Garrett’s gonna take me to do the registration, Tony,” she announced as she came out of the bathroom, face made up and looking too sexy for running errands. Her jeans were plastered to her legs, and her t-shirt was thin and holey.

I couldn't take it anymore. “Seriously, Bella? I go outta my way to buy you a car, and you ask your boyfriend to get it registered for you? Am I literally that much of a schmuck to you?” My words exploded from my mouth without thought or consequence. “Is Garrett putting you up? Is Garrett looking out for you when you bring guys home that don't take no for an answer? No, that’s me.” I dug my thumb into my chest. “I put up with all of your shit, just to be stepped on time and time again.”

Her eyes narrowed, and I watched as she went from sweet and agreeable to ice cold bitch. “I appreciate your gesture, Tony, but if you bought me the damn thing just to get in my pants, you can take it back. Sell it for scrap metal for all I care. You offered to help me, remember? Don’t throw it back in my face because your long term goal didn't work out. You and me, we’re friends. So take your woe is me bullshit and shove it up your ass.”

She grabbed her purse and slammed her way out of the apartment.

I dropped heavily onto the couch and put my head in my hands. I didn't think I had been expecting payment for the nice things I’d done. Hadn't I sat by silently while she’d brought men into my apartment? Hadn't I let her date whoever she wanted and never hinted that it wasn't okay or that I wanted more? I was the nice guy, letting her do what she wanted with whomever she wanted. All I wanted was to spend more time with her, to finalize the paperwork on the car I’d paid for. But no, Garrett was clearly her boyfriend for now. So she was dating an enforcer, and a brutal one at that. Considering what she went through with her father’s death, I couldn't believe she was willing to trust someone from the organization.

That was about the time I realized I didn't really know Bella at all.